10 MAJOR DIFFERENCES BETWEEN ME & SUMIKO TAN!

A list for Cowboy Caleb to prove once and for all that I am NOT Ms Preparation H.

1. Sumiko Tan is single and hating it.
Theresa Tan is married and loving it. With children. One maid. And parents-in-law she loves.

2. Sumiko Tan helped to write Lee Kuan Yew: The Man And His Ideas.
Theresa Tan bought it. I think.

3. Sumiko Tan used to get on planes with former PM Goh Chok Tong to cover political stories, and was reportedly his absolute favouritest reporter.
Theresa Tan used to get on planes to interview Sting, stalk David Duchovny, chat with Gabriel Be-Still-My-Heart Byrne, and stare at Madonna five feet away from her.

4. Sumiko Tan has a niece.
Theresa Tan has two knees.

5. Sumiko Tan has hemorrhoids.
Theresa Tan has sympathy. For Sumiko Tan. Even after 2 kids I have never had hemorrhoids, praise the Lord.

6. Sumiko Tan is the product of a Japanese mother and a Chinese father.
Theresa Tan is the product of a Teochew mother and a Teochew father and a psycho grandmother who claims to be Peranakan.

7. Sumiko Tan has a column that talks about her.
Theresa Tan has a column that talks about disabled children.

8. Sumiko Tan is insomniac and tries to sleep by licking sleeping pills.
Theresa Tan can sleep through an earthquake, no pill licking required.

9. Sumiko Tan's dog died. It ended a chapter in her life.
Theresa Tan's mom died. It started a chapter in her life.

10. Sumiko Tan is hot.
Theresa Tan is mostly warm.